So, I was approached by the Elves and they asked me to come with them or fight, but that it was "a waste of time" and that I should just come with them. I fought them anyway and summoned Jesus who descended with his M16 and promptly sprayed them to defeat. However, when the battle ended the story continued with me losing.

Is this a bug and/or is it really impossible to win?

  • 1
    The fights quite winnable without a summons, but at the end of the fight one of the elves hits you on the head with a hammer and you are dragged off to meet with the elves. Not sure if you still get XP for it. It's supposed to happen that way. It's a joke.
    – Wjousts
    Commented Dec 4, 2014 at 17:54

1 Answer 1


They told you that there was no point in fighting them...

In order for the story to advance you have to go with them, so he game will railroad you into it eventually.

If you insist on killing elves after hearing them out, you'll have several opportunities to display your loyalty to the KKK.

  • Yeah it's just that I expected to lose the battle, and it looked to me like Jesus pretty much quadrakilled them. Would this count as a bug then?
    – erb
    Commented Mar 21, 2014 at 20:12
  • I don't know that I'd call it a bug. Commented Mar 21, 2014 at 20:31
  • 5
    There are more than a few games that give you boss fights that you can 'win' but pretend you continued to be beaten into submission. It is not a bug. It is just something that games don't quite get right between letting the player interact and also moving the story along appropriately.
    – Reafexus
    Commented Mar 21, 2014 at 20:43
  • 4
    I believe this is more a satirical turn on what Reafexus mentioned. The game tells you that you cannot win and that you should not try. Even if you win the battle, the game will continue with you being taken hostage and mock you for trying.
    – Eric
    Commented Mar 23, 2014 at 14:39
  • FYI if you beat them, you do get XP from the victory, it's just delayed until after the dialogue in the eleven forest. So there IS a point in fighting :)
    – Josh
    Commented Oct 21, 2019 at 4:16

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